Semester-End Reflection

The first semester is going to be over in less than a week, and I can't say that I'll miss it when it has passed.  This has easily been the most unpleasant semester that I've had in high school.  I haven't had trouble with the type of work that I've been dealing with, but I've worked through the semester with such bizarre pacing that I couldn't wrap my head around it at times.  I've had to deal with online school - complete with all of it's difficulties - while simultaneously balancing a packed schedule in my regular classes.  There have been far too many times where I've had to speak with my teachers and explain why I was unable to complete their [assignment], and it's demoralizing to feel so powerless over my work.  My grades haven't dropped (and as long as I can do anything to prevent them from doing so, they never will), but I have put myself through hell to keep them where I want them.

While this semester has been horrendously difficult, it has not been without its successes.  I managed to turn a 30% grade in government into a 93% in just two weeks, and I have the final out of the way.  I completed my paperwork for the National Merit program and am now waiting to hear whether I have been granted Finalist status.  I have also, in the last week, been accepted to UNLV and their Honors college.  If I qualify as a National Merit Finalist, I will also be given a full-ride scholarship to UNLV, in addition to any other scholarships I receive.  If I only look at these accomplishments, the last four months have been life-changing, but these accomplishments were not given to me; I earned them with weeks upon weeks of late nights and grueling sessions of work.

I would not be willing to trade these accomplishments for the stress I endured if I had to continue on the same haphazard road.  To that end, I plan on re-organizing myself for the coming semester and completing all of my work in the most timely and responsible manner that I can.  If I can grow up a little and stop worrying about when I'll be able to relax waste time, maybe I'll actually feel accomplished when I reach my goals.